Lean on me

A brief guide to Tongan meats:

Puaka (Pig) - Mainly for celebrations or special occasions. A local piglet consists of a set of bones covered with a thin film of meat, an inch or so of pure fat, and skin. We tear into it with our hands. I am usually asked to start, and rip off a lard covered leg praying that somehow this one will be different and actually have some meat on it.

Crisco anyone?

Sipi (Mutton) - From New Zealand, this import consists of inch-long rib bones covered with a thick sludge of sheep fat. Banned in most Pacific islands for it health effects, it is a favorite here. The Tongans use the few teeth they possess to crush and eat the rib bones. Slurp, crunch, slurp crack crunch... Yes it as gross as it sounds.

Moa (chicken) - Also imported from New Zealand, only the leg quarters and backs arrive here. White meat is not considered edible. A typical preparation is to hack the chicken into small pieces with a short knife (short here means under 18 inches). A leg may become four pieces of meat embedded with shattered bone fragments. The bones are usually eaten.

Moa Tonga (Local Chicken) - I am confused. There are chickens everywhere here. Lots of them. roosters crow all night. Pigs snap up small chicks that get too close. Chicken everywhere.

So why are we paying a lot of scarce money for imported chicken? None of the trainees has seen a local chicken on a plate, and even eggs are purchased, not collected.

After much inquiry my host dad announces that tomorrow I will be blessed with Moa Tonga. I request that he select a rooster, then I will benefit from both a meal and additional sleep.

ASIDE - Did I mention that I will try any local food? Food defines local culture.

I am the only trainee who will, and it is a great source of pride for both my host families. There is much village discussion about the Peace Corps trainees and each family tries to outdo the others with stories about "my Palangi". I am the prize Palangi (foreigner) in my village. My host dad brags at Kava that I eat Kuli, Hosi and anything else he eats.

Back to my Moa Tonga. As I arrive from language class I step over its steaming guts. They are in front of the door to the house and have not yet been discovered by any of the local scavengers with the exception of a cloud of flies.

Moa Tonga is the skinniest and toughest chicken you can imagine. Even boiled I fear for my teeth as I struggle to tear the dry flesh from the bone. It is bad. I do not let on. MMMmmmmm Ifo! (Yummy) I say!

I get one Moa Tonga as special treat each week after that.


MMmmm Ifo Aupito!